What to Do When New Problem Behaviors Pop Up at School

The new school year brings fresh routines, new teachers, and new friends. But sometimes, it also brings a phone call or email that parents dread: “We’ve noticed some problem behaviors in class.”

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone! I’ve even received this same phone call last year with my youngest son. Many children struggle with the big transition back to school. The good news? There are clear, positive steps you can take to support your child.

1. Pause and Listen

Hearing about problem behaviors can feel overwhelming. Before reacting and automatically defending your child, pause and listen carefully to what the teacher is sharing. Ask:

• What specific behavior is happening?

• When and where does it occur?

• What happens right before and right after the behavior?

• How can I help? (This is important and shows the teacher that you and he/she are a team)

These details provide important clues that can help the team decrease the problem behavior quickly.

2. Remember: Transition Is Tough

A new classroom, schedule, and social environment can all trigger stress for kids. Behaviors often appear simply because your child is learning how to adjust. Sometimes they fade once routines feel familiar. While it would be great if our children always communicated these feelings with us, in reality, it doesn’t usually happen that way. The problem behaviors are usually their way of telling us something is not feeling right.

3. Team Up With the Teacher

Approach the situation as a partnership. Share what works well at home and ask how those strategies might help at school. Teachers appreciate when parents join the team effort to support a child!

4. Focus on Small, Clear Goals

Choose one or two behaviors to target first. For example: raising a hand before speaking or following a morning routine smoothly. Keeping goals small helps your child feel successful and builds momentum for bigger changes. With my youngest son, I focused on small group activities since that was where the majority of his challenging behaviors (he was talking to his friends and not listening to the teacher) occurred.

5. Keep Communication Open

Stay in touch with your child’s teacher! Celebrate progress together and, if things don’t improve, adjust strategies as a team. Simple supports like visual schedules, breaks, or descriptive praise can make a big difference. I asked the teacher to use a simple chart that I made to indicate if he did well during small groups each day. She either marked a “Happy” or “Sad” face on the chart and he would earn a small reward depending on his behavior during the groups. She even wrote little notes to let me know how he improved.

We used Icees as his reward and even let his older brother get one if the younger one earned it (this was actually a super helpful way for older brother to naturally motivate little brother to earn the reward).

Final Thought

New problem behaviors don’t mean something is “wrong” with your child. They’re signals that your child is adjusting to change and needs extra support. With patience, teamwork, and consistent strategies, your child can find success in the classroom.

👉 If you’d like personalized guidance on supporting your child at school and home, schedule a free introductory consultation with me today!